Just took a look at who we are playing tomorrow night...could have sworn it was the Blazers....anyhow, it's the Pacers. Guaranteed this guy below, who looks like he could be the "Poster Boy" for the Riverton North Stake Church Ball League, will throw 31 down on our a*%....including 6 for 9 from the three point line. (Whistle, did you see what I said?)
But you know what, I am not going to get to down on my luck. Besides, it was this guy that carried Marquette. Not D-Bag Wade.
Sleep Easy Jazz,
Boone-Hound
Monday, January 7, 2008
Kicking us While We are Down
Really? No sex for a month?
Now I am officially concerned about our mental health as Jazz fans. We are overwhelming willing to give up our conjigal visits for a month just to see a 3 game winning streak by our beloved Jazz. Think back 10 years to what you would have given up for a chance at some nookie, not even the good nookie, just the zipper sparkin kind and now we would give up the good stuff just to see a bunch of D-bags give a damn for 3 games. I am tired of caring more about the games than the players do. As a sign of protest I suggest that we put the kids to bed early tomorrow during the Jazz game, get our wives liquored up (so they will play along with us), put on some Barry White music and enjoy an evening for a change. No recording the game for later either, I am talking about a full-fledged protest. I am tired of going to bed pissed off and unfulfilled, we should at least get to enjoy our God given right of the best 30 seconds we are capable of.
To end, I want to paraphrase the great Clark W. Griswold -
Hey. If any of you are looking for any late Christmas gift ideas for me, I have one. I'd like The Jazz, my NBA team, right here tonight. I want them brought from their post holiday slumber over there on Melody Lane with all the other rich people and I want them brought right here, with a big ribbon on their heads, and I want to look them straight in the eye and I want to tell them what a cheap, lying, no-good, rotten, four-flushing, low-life, snake-licking, dirt-eating, inbred, overstuffed, ignorant, blood-sucking, dog-kissing, brainless, dickless, hopeless, heartless, fat-ass, bug-eyed, stiff-legged, spotty-lipped, worm-headed sack of monkey shits they are. Hallelujah. Holy shit. Where's the Tylenol?
Saturday, January 5, 2008
1.5.07 Jazz @ Blazers
I've sat here for five minutes thinking how I could start this post without dropping a serious cuss bomb of some sort...It's been another five minutes and I still can't think of something else to write other than swear words...
Hammy was right. We are dillusional. We really really are. Who have we been kidding? The Jazz will struggle to make the playoffs. That is not a prediction, that is a fact.
After such a great first half, I felt like we were finally in the defensive groove needed to win on the road. We went in to halftime with all things going our way.
Then the second half started and the Jazz came out acting like they were surprised that basketball games consist of two halfs. Martell Webster could father a child in each of our families and I would have felt better about him and liked him more than allowing him to go off for 24 in the 3rd quarter. I'm starting to see why Portland liked him more than Deron in the 2005 Draft. There were times when he had more athleticism, more desire, more energy, more confidence and more potential in those two lip kissing fingers of his than our 5 players on the court.
Conversation coming out of the locker room to start the 2nd half.
CJ Miles: "What the? Hey Willy, I thought the game was over and this was just shootaround?"
Deron: "I'm not sure BJ (Derons pet name for CJ). Hey did you remember to vote for Chris Paul for the All-Star game today? I voted for him three times. Once under my real name, once under the code name of Tory Ellis, and once by my play over the past 15 games."
Memo: "Did you guys know I All-Star last year was?"
Korver to Ronnie Price (The only one who has accepted him and is nice to him): "What the hell did that seven foot Yoda just say? That guy was an All-Star?"
Ronnie Price: "I think he has himself confused with Brad Miller. I used to play with Brad. Brad is the second coolest white guy I know next to you Kyle (winks and bites his lip a little)"
Korver to himself after throwing up a little in his mouth: "I've got to get to Phoenix somehow...I bet Ashton has a place in Phoenix."
Ronnie Brewer: "Hey, who is paying for the cab ride to the pole dancing club after the game? I paid last time. "
J-Slo thinking: "We're too cocky. These little sh!#s need to learn a lesson. How can I blow this game for them. Make them tougher....learn who they are."
Even the trucking refs were getting excited about the Blazers comeback. (I did this in Photoshop...I'm kind of a big deal.)
The bench was not a fun place to be tonight.
Final Score: Jazz: heartless , Blazers: 103
Thank God Football Was On Tonight!
Great Job Jazz! I love how we let mediocre players on the opposite team look like ALLSTARS! Congrats M. Webster, you are unstoppable, well at least anytime you play the Jazz! Good thing you skipped out on college and made the jump!
This game was hard as hell too watch! They sucked me in with their great defense in the first half and then made me suffer as I watched them give away another game! Who didn't have a big night on the Trailblazers??? Thank God football was on and the Steelers lost!
Last little complaint and then I am going to try and settle down so I can go to sleep. J. Slo I know you only get 37 time outs per half but do you think you could use one, even if it is only a 30 second time out to stop a run by the other team?? I love the J. Slo theory of let them play it out until we are down by 12 or more!
PS: How do you know J. Slo doesn't give a crap about winning? Jarron "Booners favorite interview" Collins gets to play!
Still a Jazz Fan! Is are next game the trailblazers??? M. Webster could get some more Allstar votes
Are we dillusional fans?
I dont want to come off as being a Debbie downer, but I think that we might want to re-evaluate our judgements of this Jazz team. According to our poll on this blog the majority of our voters seem to think that the Jazz are going to win by 10 or more points in Portland tonight. Just in case you forgot, the Jazz are 1 - 9 in their last 10 road games and were inventing new ways to lose each time. One game it was a last second shot (Heat), the next it was blowing a 10 point lead with 4 minutes to go (Atlanta) and then in others it was just not showing up and getting the holy crap beaten out of them (Los Angeles). All of the losses included stupid turnovers, poor foul shooting and zero defensive effort. Don't get me wrong, I hope the Jazz pull this one out tonight, heaven knows they need it, but I for am going into it with no expectaions for a win. This is the reallity of being a Jazz fan in 2008.
My prediction for the game - Jazz by 12. :)
Thursday, January 3, 2008
One of those Days
Just thought I would share a few videos with you since that's all I've been doing all day. Well, that and shooting on this little hoop that I put on the back of my door. Busy time in the car industry that's for sure.
Top 10 Bloopers:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XDzgSExoErk
What happens to Millsap happens to me everytime I play basketball.
Top 10 Plays of 2007:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8z8hI3-EQI8&feature=user
I hate Manu and Baron.
Top 10 Long Balls:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VSCnd3kZT-8&feature=user
I practice these every week....just in case I need to chuck one up when we play the 4th ward.
Enjoy.
Booner
Getting my Korver Jersey On!
First off, I know this is a couple games old, but I just found this on YouTube and could not help my smile the whole time.
We should all jump on this bandwagon as well:
Not sure if you know this but I have been rooting for Korver since he was wearing knee highs at Creighton. OK, so not really, but I have always liked the guy. What Utah man can't like a white guy that fires three's like they are going out of business. Besides, other than his defense, energy, athletic ability, shooting percentage and overall skill, my game and Korvers game are a lot of like.
With as much as we move the ball, he has to be loving this team. Hopefully he continues to play well. Course, I'm sure we will trade him for Fisher next year. Fish just needs to be in a higher elevation for health reasons.
Close call with a little anxiety towards the end but a good win for the Jazz. I thought the whole team played well and it was nice to have D-Will back. He should have passed the ball around more.
Here is the Jazz upcoming schedule:
Saturday: @ Portland
Sunday: @ Portland
Monday: @ Portland
Tuesday: @ Trailblazers
Wednesday: Portland
This will be good because we haven't played them for a while.
Late,
Booner
Wednesday, January 2, 2008
1.2.08 Jazz vs. Sixers
Look at this picture.
Doesn't it look good? Let me just say that Booner said it right when he posted his awkward post (see below). This game had "Days of our Lives" written all over it. I bet Giricek handed Korver a note with his personal shooting coaches number on it. It said something like this: Go see Danny at the Lagoon Quick Shot. He did wonders for my shot, and I won a $#!* load of teddy bears there. Here is his number. Love, GG-10 (That is what the Jazz fans called me).
As an out of the closet Giricek fan, I can honestly say I like him while he was here. But now? I don't miss him. I still think he has a place in the NBA. He was a huge part in the Jazz getting past Houston last year, but I will take Korver and his 92% career free throw shooting any day of the week. What a great feeling to have someone who could knock down clutch free throws at the end of the game. Now we won't have to bring Araujo back from Europe to shoot our technical shots.
How about Iguadololaouala's dunk in the first half. I was speechless. That guy is a pure athlete. Too bad he has no leadership qualities and will be another Gilbert Arenas; good for a few highlights, but will never be respected in the league.
CJ (I'm not a fan) Miles is playing some serious ball right now. I love that elbow three that he has been hitting. I just don't see him staying with the Jazz after this season, and I am fine with that. I vow to never be a CJ fan. He reminds me too much of my 13 year old nephew who laughs at everything. Even the stuff he does good, or his own jokes.
Good win for the Jazz. It got close at the end, but I never thought this one was out of their hands. Now let's head up to Portland and pluck those Trailblazers. Get it? Pluck those Trailblazers? Like hairs? Like the ones that lead up to...ah nevermind.
Final Score: Jazz 110 Sixers 107 (Very close to Booners prediction I might add. Nice call Booner, you are a true fan...I love that new Celtics jersey you bought by the way.)
Awkward Moments in Jazz History
So, I am going to go out on a limb and say tonight's game has to be one of the most awkward moments in Jazz history. Not that I can recall that many awkward moments to begin with, but, can you imagine what Giricek is thinking coming in to tonight's game? Not only that, but it has to be weird for fans too. Do you boo, cheer, hiss, moan, or do you not do anything at all. I know what I would do, but chances are I would be in the bathroom anyway so my opinion doesn't matter. It can't be too comfortable for Korver either. I don't think he left on as bad of terms as Giri did, but still, weird. If I were either of them, I would fake sick.
If you can think of any other awkward moments in Jazz history please comment. The only other ones I can think of are as follows (in no particular order:)
1. Fisher coming back to the E.S.A as a Laker
2. Karl coming back with his friend Kobe and both of them sat at the end of the bench faking injuries and pleading innocence in Kobe's Rape case. I was at this game and they were both keeping a very low-profile sneaking in late and leaving early.
3. Even more awkward was the show they put on the jumbo-tron of the Jazz Bear making fun of Karl and Kobe...didn't the Jazz get sued for that?
4. Seeing Mark Eaton drunk as a skunk at his restaurant "Tuscany" for Jr. Prom or something. Thanks Mark. Oh , and thanks Whistle for ordering Salmon.
5. Larry H. Miller coming out on retro night in his tight shorts and old school jersey. I'm going to be honest, part of every jazz fans innocence was lost that night.
Like I said, if you have any more awkward memories, please comment. Good luck tonight Jazz. I'm still bitter but I am riding this Korver high for now so I say Jazz win 111-103. Giri will go off for 30 though and at some point after he drains a three he will turn to Sloan and do that "booby shake" girls do where you put your arms out and shimmy...you know what I am saying? Most guys would maybe do the finger to lips "shh" thing, flex their muscles, or just a cold shoulder in general but Giri isn't that smart.
Late,
Booner
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