11.30.07 Jazz vs. Lakers (The debut of Kyrylo Fesenko)

1st Half

Move over Paul, I have a new man crush...and he goes by Kyrylo Fesenko, or Fes in my living room (and everyone elses, just wanted to make it sound like I made it up).

Whistle Nuts and Booner can vouch for me that I was a fan of this guy well before tonight's game. What a great first game for the new Jazz man. Henry Abbott of ESPN's True Hoop column loves this guy and deserves a lot of credit for bringing him to the forefront of NBA writing spotlight. The guy is an interviewers dream. He provides awesome quotes and fresh humor. And the best part is, he has the game to back it up. He will be starting in Utah within 2 years. No need to resign Memo. We have our defensive big man right here. I really felt like a father watching his son play. I don't have kids, but Fes is as close as it gets for me right now.

I am blown away by AK right now. Talk about showing up.

Deron needs a big game on national TV to make up for his lame showing against the Hornets. He's off to a great start tonight.

2nd Half

I am sick of Kobe's face. Not only because I hate him, but I'm just really sick of looking at it. I swear that guy gets 50 close up camera shots a game. Honestly, I just get bored looking at it. Did Giricek go and get a part time job working the Double Shot booth at Lagoon? Because I haven't seen him for a while. How about Paul Millsap playing center. Love it. I bet it makes other tall centers feel like duxes. Getting out rebounded by a 6'7 guy. I bet they go back to their bench and justify getting out rebounded "dude, he's got long arms though".

Here is a picture of Kobe doing a double fisted pelvic thrust to some platinum blond in the crowd wearing a number 8 Kobe jersey. "It's okay baby, the only number you need to worry about is 911". Side note: I loved the boos the crowd was giving to Fish every time he touched the ball. Hey Fisher, we all see right through your lies. Not only are you bad at lay-ups, but you couldn't even look into the camera at your press conference and just tell the truth. Pathetic. (I'm not bitter, just open about my feelings.)

The Jazz obliterated the Lakers tonight. Keys to the game:

1. Holding Kobe under 30

2. Playing Fesenko more than 5 minutes

3. AK-47 and his 20 pts

4. AK-47 and his 11 assists

5. AK-47 and his 11 rebounds

6. Jazz had 14 steals (AK-47 had 6)

Not much else to say other than my Jazz Affair is in full force right now.

Final Score: Jazz 120 Lakers 96

Number of proud tears I shed for Fes tonight: 3

Yawn.....

Umm, was it just me or was that game last night completely boring? I bet there were only 54 fans in the stadium. It was so quiet that you could hear every word Boozer said all game. At least we won, that is all I have to say about that game.

Tony Allen being a dux

I couldn't link the video in the comment section of Booners post, so here it is.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Le8rMnL56w8

This is what I did today...

The car business was booming today as you can tell, so I decided to share some of my favorites with my fellow bloggers. Does watching millionaire athletes miss layups and dunks ever get old?



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cvOm7dPS0Uw&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aFChT7ovsvU&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fsO9Zzf5bDY&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=85cZB9O_LkE&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rxLmgmQSVCw&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yEmTmWO8X3o&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4p665PQ_NS0&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G-mNe9nYicY&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O3fWwtB9GJ4
The Remix
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m43sRhRZUWI&feature=related

11.26.07 Jazz @ Knicks

1st Half

I hate the Knicks. How are we down even though we are shooting the lights out? Oh, because the Knicks seem to have sold their soul to the Devil. Why is it that these lurps can come out of the gates and shoot the ball like this? I wonder how many yards of fabric it takes to make one Zach "Fat Head" Randolph headband? Probably a small herd of sheep.

2nd Half

I really hate the Knicks. This game had heartbreak written all over it. You know when your team comes storming back and you really think they are going to pull off a sweet comeback? I never once had that feeling this entire game. I honestly could have told you that we were going to lose by 2-6 points prior to tip off. Deron played incredible. Boozer did his part. The whole team honestly played pretty good basketball. The Nipperbockers just made so many of those floating running floater runners that even Brock was jealous. Overall, we lost that game thanks to two turnovers with 90 seconds to play. Poor ball management...but I still dream all my dreams in Jazz Blue. (sigh) Go Jazz.

Final Score: Jazz 109 Knicks 113

Number of times I said to myself outloud "I hate the Knicks"? 22

Reason #1,013 I hate the knicks (see below)

Jazz on the Move...

So here I am again posting something you have already seen, but at least I'm posting something right. I am trying to decide if I am going to watch another Jazz game again because I have not watched any of the last five games and what have they done....five "w's." In fact, Friday night Hammy and I were watching the game via ESPNEWS and I guarantee you have never seen two people more interested in score updates than Hammy and I. For a moment in time we felt like we were living in the pre-television days where you had to sit by the Radio to get your Sports Fix.
So, anyhow, on with the Rankings. I think we are exactly where we should be. I would be lying if I thought we could take any of the teams above us. We may have a shot in a series, but I don't know. I was at the Magic game last year and watched Dwight Howard make us look like the Bingham Bulls did when we played that team from Oakland. Remember that C.B.? Ewww. Sorry man. That was low. Especially considering my total amount of playing time with the Bulls was equal or less than your time trying out for the team. So please, forgive me. We will always have that '86-'87 Bingham B-Team though. In fact I just researched the stats from that year, here are our personal stats:

Booner: Pos. QB./Long Snapper
Pass Attempts: 13
Completions: 6
Total Yards: 22
Rushing Attempts: 7
Rushing Yards: 2
TD's: 1
Extra Points: 1
2 Point Conversions: 1
Hand offs to C.B. Jack: 48
Fumbled Handoffs to C.B. Jack: 4
Cold Sores in Team Picture: 1
QB Rating: 78.3

C.B. Jack Pos. RB, WR, Special Teams
Rushing Attempts: 48
Rushing Yards: 380
Rushing TD's: 17
Kickoff Return Average: 48 Yards
Punt Return Average: 37 Yards
Combined Return TD's: 8

Our Record: 11-0. Why we didn't go places in life I don't know. Maybe we would be a lot more successful in life if we knew at the end of the day we were going to get Orange Wedges and a Sunny D. Anyhow, here was my whole purpose in this Post:

http://sports.espn.go.com/nba/powerranking?season=2008&week=4&lpos=spotlight&lid=tab3pos1

Detroit is now a Jazz town!

Good game by the Jazz yesterday morning. Its always weird to have to wake up early to watch a Jazz game. Do NBA players even know how to set an alarm clock to wake up that early? Can you see CJ Miles struggling for a good 30 minutes to figure out how early he needs to wake up to catch the team bus before he calls one of the trainers and bribes him to come do it for him? Speaking of CJ, he is now the resident goofy pre-game handshaker for the Jazz. It cracks me up to see him waiting at the scorers table for Booz and D-Will before the game so he can get in a little hand slap with them. Booz and D-Will probably think he is one of the ball boys. I am sure that CJ likes to think that he is the reason for Boozer shooting 17 of 20. Speaking of 17 for 20, I dont think that I have ever made 17 of 20 layups in warm-ups by myself before, that was just an amazing performance by the Booz.

Good game for the Jazz though, I think that is 7 of the last 8 against Detroit now. The Pistons are quickly becoming one of the more over-rated teams in the league. Is Chauncey Billups even that good? He never plays well against the Jazz. I think that the press can stop calling the Pistons championship contenders as well, they are going to get hamered by the Celtics or the Magic in the playoffs. This was the hard game on the trip so nothing less than 2 more wins is acceptable.

When were the Jazz going to tell us that D-Will hurt his toe and that is why he was playing like D-bag for the last two weeks? I know they keep it quiet so the other teams don't try and take advantage of it, but we put out an Amber Alert on the dude and all along he was hurt. We need to come up with a good nick-name for Ronnie Price, I love that he is taking all of Giricek's minutes. I am sure Jerry was thinking, "How can I get the team to cut down on its turnovers? Hmmm.... I know, take Giricek out for the game and that will eliminate 5 traveling calls that come at the worst time possible." I want to see Price, Brewer and AK on the floor together just so we can be the most athletic team in the league for a few minutes.

The Price Is Right!!!

Not much to say except, the bench looked gooooooooood! I love Price. I didn't realize he had such a good shot. Hart actually looked pretty good. I've always been a Jason Hart guy though.
Hopefully you all caught the post game interview with Boozer. Brownie asked him if he liked the way the they played tonight, rather then the way they played against the kings. Boozer " Yeah, They kicked are ass" Then he looks at the camera and says " Excuse me, They whipped are butts" Then they sent it back up to D.J. and the boys, who could barely contain themselves from laughing. It was classic. If you have it on tivo you should watch.

One more thing, Did you see memo's lurpy ass not even put his hands up for the rebound and the ball hit him right on the head. I could not stop laughing. Memo sucks, but he will continue to shoot ever time he touches it.

Interest in Jazz hits an all-time low...

...and Salt Lake City has fewer Mormon's than ever. Ewwwww. But really, the Jazz have me sick, in fact, they brought my shingles back. Well, it was either that or the stray Cat named Shingers we took in. Hey, 'tis the season.
Anyhow, sorry, not much to say about the Jazz right now but they can make 25% of it up to me with a win over the Nets tonight. My guess is Jason Kidd is feeling so bad for D-Will right now that he will take it easy on him.
The only good news I have, if you want to call it good news is that we didn't slip out of the rankings like I thought we would after losing to Troy "Pinch & Roll" Murphy and the Panties, I mean Pacers. Here is where we ended up:

http://sports.espn.go.com/nba/powerranking?season=2008&week=3

Oh wait, I do have even better news for Whistle Nuts and all the BYU homers out there, BYU cracked the BCS at #25 this week. Nice work. If they get past the Utes this weeks that should be good enough to land them in the Playtex "Who gives a Rats" Bowl. (Course where would that leave the Utes?:(

Anyhow, Go Jazz. (I say that with as little enthusiasm as possible.)

11.17.07 Jazz @ Pacers

Mike Dunleavy scores one of his nine lay ups.

Danny Granger scores one of his seven dunks.


Jerry says "Up Yours..." to the refs.

Final Score: Jazz 97 Pacers 117

Minutes we actually paid attention to during the second half: 3